Ways to piss off Jimmy!
by Nae'ka
Summary: Now not just Jimmy! There is also Derby, Gord, Chad, Johnny, Gary, and Petey! Enjoy!
1. Chapter 1

**Title:** Ways to Piss off Jimmy!

**Summary: **A simple list. Funny, if it suites your humor. Try it!

**Rateing:** T just in case.

**Disclaimer:** I wn my notebook. That is it.

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1. Tell him Gary is WAY cooler than he is.

2. Tell Johnny that Lola is pregnant, and it's Jimmy's.

3. Put a love note in his locker signed 'Crabblesnich'.

4. Ask him what gender he is.

5. Send him to boot camp.

6. Cry, and scream for help when he comes any where near you.

7. Walk up to him and cry and scream for help.

8. Stare at him and continue to stare even as he is throwing you out the window.

9. Tell the entire school that Pete is the new king.

10. Laugh at everything he says.

11. Ask him if he has ever eaten human.

12. If he says yes, run away screaming, "CANNIBAL!"

13. If he says now tell him you ate his momma.

14.Tell him that being in bullworth helps offset your desire to mutilate small, defenseless, woodland creatures.

15. Awnser all his questions with another question, even if he's not talking to you.

16. Constanly refer to him as 'That commie-plotter'.

17. Poke him continuously.

18. Throw Peter at his face.

19. Develop an unnatural fear of chickens.

20. Call him a chicken and tell him that he should be more considerate.

21. Claim that you are allergic to his clothes and that he should take them off.

22. When he says no scream that he is, _once again_, trying to kill you.

23. Every time you see him shout, "So we meet again!" and laugh evilly.

24. Go into his room and fart. Loudly.

25. Start a 'We Hate Jareth' club. Invite him to join.

26. Reply to every thing he says with 'that's what you think!'

27. Pick your nose during a conversation with him.

28. Keep telling him that he made the 'wrong decision', and not tell him what.

29. Put a large wad of gum in his hair.

30. Blame Derby, even though he saw you do it.

31. Call him pretty.

32. Complain about how much he stinks when he enters the room, and politely ask him to leave.

33. Ask him why he loves Crabblesnitch.

34. Ask him why he denies it.

35. Start to sing the 'If you were gay' song.

36. Throw him off a cliff. (this works for every one.)

37. Give him a $300.00 gift certificate to Victoria Secrect.

38. Ask him if he has his 'time of the month' when he gets mad.

39. Walk behind him and spray everything he touches with Lysol.

40. Sing the song 'your so vain.' (Just a few hundred times. While following him around with a spotlight.)

41. Start singing 'Music of the night' at the top of your lungs. (Phantom of the Opera people!)

42. Hide in his closet and scream when he opens it.

43. Close the closet door.

44. And when she tries to open it demand that it is your property, and you will call the cops if disturbed again.

45. Call him a fairy.

46. Call him baby, and replace his bed with a crib.

47. Walk behind him and tap your shoe whenever he stops.

48. Write 'redrum' with lipstick on his mirror.

49. Blame Gary.

50. Tell him that Pete and Gary are engaged.

51. Start his room on fire.

52. And lock the door.

53. Point to his face and scream.

54. Call him 'Timmy'.

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There you go! I'm off to play with the Random slogan generator!

Nae'Ka-chan


	2. Chapter 2

Guess who had a little inspiration????? GUESS!!!! MEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!

Okay... yeah.

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**Ways to piss-off Jimmy** (and now with other characters), Chapter 2 

1. Start singing the Noma Numa song as a way to wake him up in the morning (Romanian)

2. Have Derby and Bif do number 1.

3. Tell him Petey is pregnant.

4. Ask him to join the "Gary fan-girls" club.

5. Ask him why he is such a whore.

6. Tell him Pete is a prostitute.

7. Reply to everything he says with "that's what you think."

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**How to tick-off Derby** (if you are a prep, that is, living in Harrington house) 

1. Claim that you must always wear a bicycle helmet as part of your "astronaut training."

2. Adjust the tint on the HD-TV so that all the people are green, and insist to him that you "like it that way."

3. Wear a lot of cologne. (EWWWW)

4. Tell him Pinky is sleeping with Bif, see who he gets more pissed at.

5. Practice making fax and modem noises.

6. As much as possible, skip rather than walk.

7. Tell him that his accent isn't fooling anyone.

8. Pay for your dinner with pennies.

9. Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room.

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**How to bother Gord**

1. Dress only in clothes colored Hunter's Orange.

2. Wear your pants backwards.

3. Tie jingle bells to all your clothes.

4.Occasionally bark in a high-pitched voice.

5. Say "Okay, so you're gay." to anything he says.

6. As he talks, smell his shoulders.

7. Tell him Jimmy likes Vance ALOT more.

8. When standing near a him, ask something along the lines of "Excuse me, but do I have a booger hanging on my nose? I thought I picked it off."

9. Speak in a strong Welsh accent.

10. Wear odd shoes.

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**Ways to irritate Chad**

1. Call his dog "dog".

2. Bark like a dog whenever he says the word "the."

3. Ride a unicycle to school.

4. Stare at him for about five minutes, making sure he knows you're staring at him. Then, slowly sneak up to him while humming the Mission: Impossible theme. Sniff his head, then run away. Repeat.

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Okay, enough of the preps

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**Ways to agitate Johnny**

1. First and foremost, make out with Lola. That ALWAYS gets him.

2. Tell him Derby could kick his ass.

3. Tell him _Pedro_ could kick his ass.

4. While walking make car noises loudly (Such as changing gears).

5. Constantly pronounce his name wrong. (Veencahnt)

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**Ways to drive Gary insane... er... more insane**

1. Tell him Pete is Jimmy's secret agent.

2. Do not add any inflection to the end of your sentences, producing awkward silences with the impression that you'll be saying more any moment.

3. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do you hear that?", "What?", "Never mind, it's gone now."

4. Lie obviously about trivial things such as the time of day.

5. Listen to 33RPM records at 45RPM speed, and claim the faster speed is necessary because of your "superior mental processing."

6. Ask him mysterious questions and then scribble his answers in a notebook. Mutter something about "psychological profiles."

7. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophecy."

8. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears.

9. Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce "No, wait, I messed it up," and repeat.

10. Sing the theme to the Batman television show as loudly as you can, over and over and over..

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**Ways to Upset Petey**

1. Call him "femme-boy".

2. Call him "Dork".

3. Call him "Gary".

4. Ask which one of the above he prefers.

5. Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a "croaking" noise.

6. Scream at random moments of a conversation, then continue on as normal.

7. Ask him if he is still a virgin.

8. Daily.

9. Wear a cape that says "Magnificent One."

10. Make him refer to Gary as the "Great Intellectual".

11. Ask him if his fathers are married.

12. "Forget" the punch line to a really really really long joke, but assure him that it was a "real hoot."

13. Ask to "interface" with him.

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If you want more, or a certain character up here, REVIEW! Muahahaha. lol. 

xxMExx


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